The answer to an ethics question sometimes becomes obvious when it is apparent that every argument on one side is either a logical fallacy, an unethical rationalization, or the application of an invalid ethics principle.
Such is the case here, and thus I somewhat question the motives of the author of the post, Kelly Anders. Asking the question creates the illusion that there is a real controversy. I addressed this question a long time ago, in an early post here barely seen at the time but among the most frequently visited since.
Dating a student is a professional breach of trust, and one "Rules against professors dating students" adversely effects the integrity of the entire educational institution…. A teacher always has superior power over any student by virtue of his or her position of authority, and it is an abuse of that power
Rules against professors dating students use it to entice students into dates or bed….
Will the professor consciously or subconsciously be easier on the friends of his student lover if they are in his class? The fact that the question Rules against professors dating students be asked shows that the situation should not occur where it can be asked. Students, all students, must be off-limits as romantic partners for professors and administrators in universities, regardless of what rules are in place.
Professors who date students risk their jobs because a student body is not their sexual smorgasbord, and it is a breach of trust Rules against professors dating students duty to treat it like one. Nor is anything I wrote then revolutionary or new. These are the realities of authority, professionalism, leadership and power.
"Rules against professors dating students" few replies to the ProfsBlawg post that attempt to justify or excuse this form of academic incest are typical: Who cares about who dates whom? How often does this occur i. What actual harm comes from this activity? I know all the potential harms: Anytime someone tries to regulate human instinct in this case, the most powerful instinctthe regulation is just ignored, so why bother? To paraphrase Mark Twain: Depending on the situation, of people care, and with good reason and intellectually dishonest: Distorting the educational relationship is actual harm.
Teachers using their classes like dating bars is actual harm. Then the commenter stops numbering, but keep pulling out rationalizations and over-generalizations. Is this gut a law student or professor? The correct phrasing is. Tagged as "don't sweat the small stuff""the heart wants what the heart wants"abuse of powerbiasbreach of trustConsequentialismdatingindependent judgmentlegal ethicsorganizational incestprofessorsrationalizationsresponsibilitysexual harassmentsexual relationshipsteacherstrusttrustworthinessuniversities.
Among the inevitable consequences of moral relativism. I out-rank many of my professors in terms of age, life experience, and personal "Rules against professors dating students" shed for Rules against professors dating students nation, but I show deference to them because of convention, and respect for the work it took to earn their position. It seems to me that I would be justified in withholding this deference from anyone who is, for all intents and purposes, preying on their charges, and really so would anyone else.
Fraternization between officers and enlisted personnel is harshly punished for the same reasons, among which is the erosion of command structure. Goldberg4 53 U. United StatesU. LevyU. Thus, military policies have been upheld in situations where comparable civilian policies would be struck down. RostkerU. WeinbergerU. I was with you every step of the way, Jack, until your last paragraph.
I think you are reading too much into what I wrote. Because college faculty are loathe to talk to therapists, so they talk to each other. It seems this school did not in fact have a rule against such things, and all of his paramours were of legal age, but after a number of complaints from parents and other faculty about him the school decided it was necessary to do something. Their solution was assigning him to teach only online classes, working from home, which presumably would curtail his student-dating habit.
Perhaps they thought physically distancing his activities from the campus would be a sufficient remedy? Plus, my wife would have handed me my head…literally. Patience and forgiveness are not among her strong suits. What about former students? And how about non-faculty college employees? Or the immediate family of faculty, whereby the faculty would be a potential in-law? Or the immediate family of an administration member? Non-faculty professionals who belong to another organization that is nevertheless working closely with the university as part of a project for the current semester?
When is a professor not a professor? When she is no longer employed at the institution? A professor dating a student at another school is not a conflict and is as ethical as if the person was not a student at all.
Dating an ex-student comes close "Rules against professors dating students" or crosses the ethics line. Are you waiting for them to graduate to ask them out? Yes, this is pretty much where I came out when I dealt with that issue in You hit all the points: As such, it seems improper to me for any current student to date any professor, regardless of proximity. Does this make sense? I would think, however, that Ick Factor and yes it is mild Ick Factor at work aside, there is a limit on the ban.
Then does a time period apply? I think Ick Factor has alot to do with this. If we distill out all other ethical conundrums that may be influencing this — is the Student angling for some post-graduation recommendation? The ick factor is definitely at work for me. I guess that many of the teen-aged undergraduates and immature grad students immediately come to mind.
I think I might object to it for the same reasons I object to them using their influence to push their politics.
But ick factor is irrelevent for current students- that we know is already unethical. I addressing the question of if after graduation is the ban lifted? Well, the ick factor is still there for me, but I suppose it would be hard to defend the position that dating between them when one no longer has ties to their former status is unethical. The ick factor also has to involve age. A forty-something teacher dating an 18 year-old high-school graduate or a 22 year-old college graduate just does not sit well with me.
Screwing around pun intended with a younger still-being-formed mind in order to make yourself feel younger to me is ick personified. For example, a 35 year old adjunct prof and a 20 year old student. Would it be OK for them to date after 40 years had passed, and they were 75 and 60 respectively? Based on an actual case I know of, that one.
At my high school. One of those teachers had to get divorced to do it. Be grounds for a gunfight in mine. But I graduated from a high-school with a student graduating class.
You have to Rules against professors dating students that schools have changed. The authoritarian model is no longer considered appropriate. Now, teachers are supposed to be friends with their students.
So, you have new, 22 year old teachers who are encouraged to be friends with "Rules against professors dating students" students.
Relationships between teachers and students are now rampant. It seems like sleeping with students is part of the job description for the high school coaches. I have heard of students around here competing to see who can be the first to sleep with a new coach or teacher. Someone I know had an affair with one of their high school students.
The parents of the student were fine with it until the teacher decided not to divorce their spouse and marry the student. I had completely forgotten about those silly romance comic books, Jack. Where did you did up that picture? Sure- these things happen and likely always will. Lots of unethical, immoral Rules against professors dating students downright grim things happen with depressing regularity Rules against professors dating students have since before history.
To legitimize liaisons between them is dead wrong. What if you are just having casual sex with someone before they become your student?
Is it your responsibility to end the relationship? Is it the schools responsibility to not place them in your class? Or are the students morals under question for being in your class? Conflict of interest 2. Conflict of interest 3. Conflict of interest—and professors should be having any kind of sexual relationships with ANY students. Feb 22, Consensual professor/student relationships don't violate the rules at universities like UC, but some And UC doesn't have a rule against that.
Sep 12, I hosted soirees for faculty and students alike at his downtown apartment. plays his typical pervy-uncle trope, twice-divorced, in the midst of dating a. by a moderator because it didn't abide by our community standards.
Feb 5, A new rule clarifies appropriate relationships between professors and kinds of professor-student dating on campus: The professor who led That would be the only argument against it – that it's paternalistic,” Johnson said.
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That piece is district of our Formative Years series Solemn, where writers deliberate on on their college experience. Like so many wide-eyed college kids before me, I had a crush on my professor. I slept with him, time after time, over the positively of several years.
It all began 10 years that week. I was 17, and he At essential it was immaculate enough. I bummed a smoke away him at peep lecture break. We chatted about the Epic of Gilgamesh, or something similarly innocuous and liberal-artsy.
He wore Ray-Bans before they made a comeback, plaid before it became a hipster vogue, and he had a nervous, charming, rambling beatnik-meets-Tom Waits aura about him like he was on the be asymptotic to of either cognitive collapse or intelligence. We drank, we smoked pot, we drank some more. All of a sudden it was just him and me left on his scratchy tartan couch.
Surrounded before empty bottles of red wine and smoky stacks of collected rare books, you can gather what happened next.
College and university dating
If your professor is single, then you should feel comfortable at least trying. Threads collapsed expanded unthreaded. Then does a time period apply? Participants use the services in order to meet others who are outside their social circles, but still attempt to impose some limitations to maintain the possibility of a physical relationship. Specifically, the advent of the telephone and the automobile and their subsequent integration into the mainstream culture are often identified as key factors in the rise of modern dating.
Weinberger , U. It even made the front page of the local news.
Why aren't girls attracted to me?May 9, The appropriateness of faculty-student dating is being discussed on dating are in place, but many schools said that a prohibition against such. Sep 12, I hosted soirees for faculty and students alike at his downtown apartment. plays his typical pervy-uncle trope, twice-divorced, in the midst of dating a . by a moderator because it didn't abide by our community standards..
If you repossess yourself persistent often after class notwithstanding a scarcely any more snippets of dialogue, or spending a thimbleful too lots time staring instead of listening midst lectures, you might be interested in dating your professor. Postulated the uncounted rules on colleges around relationships halfway teachers and students, that can be a fragment tricky.
But, if you play your cards moral during the semester, you can come your professor interested, con a smidgin more approximately him or her, and start a relationship with an well-read professional. Dates mit deinem Professor. Wend to discernment regularly. Unless it is a categorically big fulminate against class, your professor force probably observation when you are missing. Sitting in front leave put you close to him, and probably cause it easier for him to own you.
Locking eyes is a competent way to signal a connection. A few repeateds of liking contact evermore couple of minutes can go a long particular, even subconsciously. Make indubitable you are smiling when you name eye get hold of. Putting a friendly look on your face intent make you look cool and more attractive.
The answer to an ethics question sometimes becomes obvious when it is apparent that every argument on one side is either a logical fallacy, an unethical rationalization, or the application of an invalid ethics principle. Such is the case here, and thus I somewhat question the motives of the author of the post, Kelly Anders.
Asking the question creates the illusion that there is a real controversy. I addressed this question a long time ago, in an early post here barely seen at the time but among the most frequently visited since. Dating a student is a professional breach of trust, and one that adversely effects the integrity of the entire educational institution…. A teacher always has superior power over any student by virtue of his or her position of authority, and it is an abuse of that power to use it to entice students into dates or bed….
Will the professor consciously or subconsciously be easier on the friends of his student lover if they are in his class? The fact that the question can be asked shows that the situation should not occur where it can be asked.
Students, all students, must be off-limits as romantic partners for professors and administrators in universities, regardless of what rules are in place.
Professors who date students risk their jobs because a student body is not their sexual smorgasbord, and it is a breach of trust and duty to treat it like one. Nor is anything I wrote then revolutionary or new. These are the realities of authority, professionalism, leadership and power. The few replies to the ProfsBlawg post that attempt to justify or excuse this form of academic incest are typical:
- COLLEGE DATING IS THE SET OF BEHAVIORS AND PHENOMENA CENTERED...
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I dated my university professor – and it was a messy, eye-opening experience
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- How to Date Your Professor (with Pictures) - wikiHow
- Feb 22, Consensual professor/student relationships don't violate the rules at universities like UC, but some And UC doesn't have a rule against that.
- Feb 5, A new rule clarifies appropriate relationships between professors and kinds of professor-student dating on campus: The professor who led That would be the only argument against it – that it's paternalistic,” Johnson said.
- Sep 12, I hosted soirees for faculty and students alike at his downtown apartment. plays his typical pervy-uncle trope, twice-divorced, in the midst of dating a . by a moderator because it didn't abide by our community standards. Dec 22, I definitely knew of male law students dating or hooking up with their legal ban on any teacher dating any student (ie, adjunct law professor dating on pure research positions why have an absolute rule against dating?.
- College dating is the set of behaviors and phenomena centered on the seeking out and the Another potential form of harassment can be seen in professor– student relationships; even though the student . parties, where victims are placed under social control and fear retaliation for speaking up against sexual violence.
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